ayoko na palang maging PILOTO…
October 8th, 2007 by yohji-ko-cute_hinugot mula sa dati nang likha_
… Ayun, since I did not have a choice, I tried to accept it nalang, thinking that the very reason why I was separated from them is that I will be going to somewhere more special than where they will be, just to compensate for the negative feeling.
Days passed. I tried not to think about it. Until the first day came…
“ Sana may kakilala ako,” I wished. Yun nga lang, di napagbigyan ang hiling. I was placed in a room filled with strangers. I tried to establish myself there, to have some friends and to be happy with where I am. I was lucky anyway; I really was in a more special place (according to the bantays).
Hanggang sa dumaan ang maraming araw. I still felt bad for being in that “more special place”. hindi kasi nagwork ang nasimulan ko. mahirap palang makisama sa mga taong "matatangkad". (haha) lalo pa pag may naglagay ng "barrier". Hai…
Other people would see it as a privilege to be there, they wanted to be there, yun nga lang, the machine did not allow them to be there. I did not want to be there, but the machine did not allow me not to be there. How sad no, palit nalang tayo?
Dumaan pa ang mas maraming araw. I felt more and more depressed. Tapos, someone was making a hell out of my sad life pa. Everyday I tried to enter the room with the “positive attitude” that I will be keeping for the rest of the day, un nga lang, that geek always does everything in his power to ruin my day and my positive attitude. Kayamot no? That person, sa ngayon, is the biggest challenge life has ever given me. It’s very dificult to try to remain good kahit na sa totoo lang, gusto ko na siyang tadyakan sa muka, ipakagat sa mga antik at ilublob sa tubig. (morbid ba?kulang pa yan, buti na nga lang mai tatlong linggong ibinigay sa akin upang huwag makita ung taong un) Sobrang hirap mag-timpi, lalo na sa mga taong tulad ko na hindi ganon kahaba ang pasensya… asar talaga!
Kaya naman ang aking life, mula sa dating happy all day, naging yamot and miserable all day. The place that I thought was special, in reality, is not that special after all. (o baka special nga siya, hindi ko lang nakikita na special siya.) Mas special pa rin yung room where I was with my old pals. SB Room 410 during Physics class, every Tuesday and Friday 09:00 am – 11:30 am…
Sa ngayon, I love Sundays, Wednesdays and Thursdays… hahaha at narealize ko na hindi naman pala kailangan na ikaw ang magpalipad ng eroplano para marating mo ang ulap, mas masarap at mas masayang maging ORDINARYONG pasahero lamang… kaya naman ang pangarap ko dati na maging piloto, binitiwan ko na.
AYOKO NG MAGING PILOTO hahaha
..ee..
